The Power of Self-Awareness

Have you ever wondered why, despite all your hard work, experience and success, you’ve hit a roadblock?


Maybe you’ve been passed over for a promotion you were sure you deserved. Perhaps the follow-up never came after an interview you were sure you aced. Maybe you don’t feel fully validated or respected as a leader. Or perhaps your revenues or compensation aren’t growing at the level you feel is worthy of you.

If you're hitting the same obstacles over and over again, there’s probably one thing missing: self-awareness.

This might sound simple, but many high achievers are so focused on external results that they neglect to turn their attention inward.

If this resonates, keep reading because in this article, you’ll discover why self-awareness is your secret weapon for higher effectiveness. 

Metacognition: the science behind self-awareness

Self-awareness isn’t just a feel-good concept; it’s rooted in solid science. Psychologists call it metacognition: the ability to observe your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors as they happen. Think of it like having an internal observer that can step back and watch you in action. When you develop this skill, you’re no longer operating on autopilot. Instead, you're taking steps forward to become the conscious director of your performance.

Here’s what happens when you lack self-awareness:

• You keep repeating the same behaviors, expecting different results.
• You react instead of respond.
• You wonder why you’re stuck in the same patterns but can’t see what you’re doing to create them. 

But when you develop metacognitive awareness, everything changes:

• You begin to notice the thoughts that precede your actions.
• You catch yourself before you fall into unproductive patterns.
• You start making conscious choices instead of unconscious reactions.

Why high-achievers struggle with self-awareness

Years ago, I was exactly where you may be now. I was a corporate VP and had success in my investment career, but between long hours at work and family responsibilities, I felt stretched thin, stressed, and underappreciated. I wanted a clear roadmap forward, but didn't know where or how to start.

Around 2010, I came across Joseph Campbell’s advice to “Follow your bliss.” It resonated deeply. I craved less stress and more fulfillment, so I took the leap into self-employment. I hustled, invested, and worked even harder. But after a few years, the stress only grew and I realized something was missing.

That missing piece was self-awareness. In 2013, when I began studying personal growth in earnest, I finally understood how my limiting beliefs and self-image had been holding me back. As I learned to shift them - tapping into my higher faculties and aligning with who I was meant to be - everything changed. I gained clarity, confidence, and impact. My income grew, my leadership deepened, and I built my business with greater ease and purpose.

You might think that successful people would naturally be self-aware. After all, they’ve achieved significant results. But here’s a paradox I observed in both myself and in my clients. The very traits that make people successful such as drive, focus, and an action-orientation, can work against self-awareness.

High achievers are often so focused on the external world, the next goal, or the next deal, that they may not pause to examine their internal world. This makes it challenging to step back and observe their patterns. It often takes an emotional shock or disappointment to serve as the wake-up call - like in my story, when my stress kept worsening.

The solution:  build your metacognition muscles

The good news? Self-awareness is a skill you can develop. Like any muscle, the more you exercise it, the stronger it becomes. Here’s what I did and now share with clients:

Step 1: Create self-observation moments

Schedule brief check-ins throughout your day. Set three alarms on your phone, and when they go off, simply ask yourself: “What am I thinking right now? What am I feeling? What am I doing?” Don’t judge, just observe. This practice trains your brain to step into the observer role. 

Step 2: Notice your triggers

Pay attention to situations that consistently trigger the same reactions. Maybe you always get defensive in certain meetings. Maybe you procrastinate on specific types of tasks. These patterns are goldmines of self-awareness. As Carl Jung said, “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

Step 3: Track your energy patterns

For one week, keep a simple energy log. Rate your energy from 1 to 10 at different times of day, and note what activities, people, or thoughts preceded those ratings. You’ll start seeing patterns that reveal what energizes and drains you.

Step 4: Practice pausing

Before reacting to challenging situations, take some deep breathes and create the space to pause. Ask: “How do I want to show up here?” This simple practice interrupts automatic patterns and allows you to choose a more intentional response.

The transformation begins

When you start building self-awareness, something remarkable happens. You begin to see yourself as both the actor and the director of your own life. For example, you might notice the thoughts that lead to procrastination before you procrastinate. Or you might catch the emotional reactions that derail important conversations so that you can have constructive conversations.

This isn’t about perfection. It’s about awareness. And what you can observe, you can change. When you develop the ability to see your patterns clearly, you gain the power to consciously choose different ones.

As Viennese psychiatrist Viktor Frankl once said, "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." Self-awareness allows you to create that space.

The most effective leaders I work with share this common trait: they’ve developed the ability to observe themselves without judgment. They know their strengths and their blind spots. They can catch themselves in unproductive patterns and pivot quickly.

Your next step

Self-awareness is the foundation of all meaningful change. Without it, you simply hope that doing more of the same will produce different results. But with it, you become the conscious architect of your success.

Start today with just one observation moment. Set an alarm for this afternoon, and when it goes off, simply notice: What am I thinking? What am I feeling? What am I doing?

That simple act of noticing is where transformation begins.

If you'd like to learn more about building self-awarenss and changing old patterns, watch my YouTube video:  The REAL Reason You're Stuck:  5 Steps to Reprogram Your Subconscious Mind